Lived Experience Forum

[Sad2305]

Hi everyone, I have always known there was something wrong with me and have recently found out that I BPD. I've become very insular and isolated due to people finding me hard to be around, losing my job due to an accident, break downs of relationships and generally having too many emotions or not enough. I have always felt " not a part of a group" and have always felt lonely. My self worth is crappy and I am a jealous person. All I want is connection and confidence and to not feel alone. Am I asking too much? 

[lavenderhaze]

Hi @Sad2305, welcome to forums! 🙂 Thank you for sharing.

I am sorry to hear that you are feeling isolated. I understand how tough that can be. 

It's common to feel isolated and disconnected when dealing with mental health challenges, but please remember that there are people who understand what you're going through and are here to offer support.

Discovering that you have BPD can be overwhelming, but it's also an important step towards understanding yourself better and seeking the support you need. 

I relate to a lot of what you have said, especially feeling like I don't belong or struggling with self-worth. I know it can be rough, but it's important to recognise that these feelings don't define you. Sometimes, our brains lie to us.

You're not asking too much to want connection, confidence, and to feel like you belong. These are fundamental human needs, and you deserve to have them fulfilled. It may take time and effort, but with the right support and resources, I am certain that you will get there.

Do you have any professional support in place?

[Snowie]

Hi @Sad2305 welcome to the Sane forums. 

Whilst I don't have BPD I know there are plenty of members that do have it that will be able to relate to what you are saying.

I really don't think that you are asking too much. Regardless of where we are in our mental health journey, we all want that connection and to not feel alone. 

That is where these forums are a great support to have. You will find yourself never alone and always find members that you can relate too or someone around to talk too.

Please keep posting and keep reaching out.

[Xibon]

Hey @Sad2305 it's lovely to meet you 😊

I want to say straight away that you are not asking too much. You are worthy of love and acceptance, and deserve a sense of belonging just as you are.

I'm sorry that you've been through so much. All the compounding stressors (job loss, relationship- breakdown, and not having reliable social outlets) would be a lot to deal with. You do deserve love, and acceptance, and it's awful to hear that life has thrown so much at you.

May I ask if the diagnosis of BPD has been helpful? Diagnoses can be empowering to some, and stigmatising to others. I am not suggesting it is one way or the other for you, just wanting to ask for your valuable persepctive 🌻

It's so great that you've messaged here, and I hope you feel acceptance and warmth within this community. Your words also show great strength, self awareness, and capacity for change though, and I genuinely think you should feel proud for the steps you are taking.

Thanks for allowing us to help with your recovery journey.
With Kindness,
Xibon ❤️

[Jasper_123]

Hi @Sad2305 , 

thanks for sharing with the forum and welcome to the space! It can be a great space to ask for advice or to vent about your feelings and experiences! 

You are absolutely worthy of love and respect! I have found a big part of this comes from within and recognising that you are enough! On my own journey I found doing small things to build my confidence and then growing that into bigger goals (I changed jobs, I learned to drive, I tried new things on my own that I'd always been interested in) can help these feelings. 

You can't change how people interact with you but you can control how you interact with the world. 

[tyme]

Hey @Sad2305 ,

Welcome to the world of BPD. I have BPD. 

Yes, I've certainly had struggles, but I learnt so much from having BPD. 

I'd love to tell you more about it if you are up for it. 

In the meantime, do you have supports to help you through this?