Not Coping

[ENKELI]

@Snowie I heard that ECT is very tiring. I'm glad you're feeling better. Big hugs, exciting news you get to go home tomorrow 🤗

[Snowie]

@Birdofparadise8 i have just read your message about what is happening with you. Im sorry that you are having to go through all of this. It must be a huge impact on your mental health.

[Birdofparadise8]

Oh, it's okay. It happened a while ago. @ENKELI asked why I didn't talk with my cousin, so I wanted to explain what happened at the end of 2022. 

But thank you it was hard at the time. I still feel like I'm walking on eggshells around her. Like she doesn't know I went into hospital twice that I attempted or anything. 

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 she's not brave at all, especially given it was composed by her mother and school psych.

For me, GD's behaviour also came from her mother. GD would sit there and tell me how awful I was to her and her mother who I supported financially and emotionally for 8 years let her get away with it. When I challenged the mother she said she thought it was good GD was able to express her feelings. I said then why didn't she express her feelings by thanking me for spending thousands of dollars on her? Of course that was different.

Is this the daughter of your aunt you are close with?

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 I forgot to add that the strict timing when you could contact her is a load of bunkum as well. There is no way she was only able to contact you for that specific time, especially knowing you worked at that exact time.

I have been a pacifist all my life but seriously I want to slap your cousin. I think it stems from wanting to slap GD for doing the same thing.

[Birdofparadise8]

No, they don't have any children. They are too old, and they like their lifestyle. They have a dog, though. 

@ENKELI Well, I think it was. I'm not 100% they did it. She just told me she talked to them both and they thought it would be best if she didn't talk to me because of her anxiety. She was worrying about it a lot. 

[Birdofparadise8]

Yes I know very bad @ENKELI 

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 at 14, 15 I don't think she would have been emotionally mature to write such a message, there was definitely adult intervention.

It really is not fair that we have to endure this type of thing. It's something I dwell on a lot, especially being a person of faith. God doesn't protect us for a variety of reasons and I know that logically but emotionally I am always asking why? Why did He allow all the BS that happened last year happen?

I cling to the hope that in the end I will be stronger and more resilient for it and that my experiences might help someone else going through similar situations.

And Happy International Womens' Day 

Happy International Womens' Day

[Blackbird11]

Hi @Birdofparadise8 @Shaz51 @ENKELI 

How has your day been? Do you have plans for the weekend?

[ENKELI]

@Blackbird11 greetings, how are you?

My day hasn't sucked which is always good. I had a cathartic sob last night and feel lighter today.

I am going to an 80's Quiz Night on Saturday, should be fun. How about yourself?