Not Coping

[Birdofparadise8]

That's okay @Former-Member 

Yeah, it's annoying. It happens on both hands. I wouldn't be able to be a chef anymore if I had continued because when I'm trying to chop things, my fingers go all crazy, and I'm at risk of cutting myself, which is just annoying when cooking. I also find it hard to use my fingers with Legos, art and many other things that require fine motor skills. I swear they have a mind of their own. 

Overall, it was a good game, but Carlton lost. They got so many points that should have been goals. Do you watch football? What are you doing today? 

I need to do the introduction for my group lab report. I'm unsure how many words to do as there is no word count. 

Aww, that's okay @Former-Member. Yes, you do very much. I was happy when I saw your name on my emails this morning. 🫂💖🥰🌸

[creative_writer]

@Former-Member been having body flashbacks today. I know it’ll eventually go away, but for now, I have to sit with it. How are you doing today? 💖

Arrange marriages are also common in my culture. I don’t necessarily need to go for an arranged marriage, if I was to meet a guy, I would be able to get married if parents agreed on both sides. I’ll have time either way to get to know the person before jumping into a marriage. You need to know a person in order to determine if someone is compatible

Marriage is anxiety provoking because I fear trauma would make things a bit harder. I feel worthless because of what happened, I’m afraid of how people will view me if they knew. I am also sensitive to touch and need my space at times

[Former-Member]

Hey there @Birdofparadise8 🙂🌺

I’m ok thank you 🤗🌺

just a bit slower than usual, but hopefully time will be kind and I’ll get some pace and rhythm back to the days soon! ☺️🙌🏻

how are you doing today dearest? 

[Former-Member]

Yes, it’s very tricky when hands and fingers don’t do what we would like them to do in terms f fine motor control.. I’m sorry you have to manage with a tremor, and I hope it can get better for you over time 💜🙂🌺 @Birdofparadise8 🤗

I find that so much focus is required to get my hands to do their job sometimes! ☺️

Sounds like the game didn’t go to plan for Carlton despite playing well for the most part. 
I don’t watch football anymore.. I used to watch league games but when I was working in allied health, part of the client base was football players, and so as I watched them play, all I could see were their injuries and how I would then be planning their treatment and recovery from that moment onwards.. I stopped seeing the ‘game’ and only saw the ‘rehab’, if that makes sense? Then, I never got back into it once I moved into a new direction with my work 🙂🌺

Im thinking to get out of the house and maybe go for a drive - I haven’t done that for ages and I’m tired of being home 24/7 besides medical appointments. 
I do miss going to theatres, shows, and restaurants, as all as other places like museums and galleries..unfortunately that’s not possible anymore. Not to worry, I am very content to have some wonderful memories of places and spaces 💜🙂🌺

Ah, that sounds interesting regarding the group lab report: are there delegated tasks, like one person writes a certain part, and another puts together a different part? 
it’s difficult without a word count, I agree. 
do you have main points of important info to introduce that you’d like to explain here? 

Thanks heaps Birdofparadise8 💜🙌🏻🌺🤗

really appreciate that dearest 🤗

Im sorry I’m not as consistent as I used to be for the moment, but when things improve, I’ll be here more often 🙂💜

always remember though, that I’ll always get back to you when I can 🙌🏻☺️🌺

[Birdofparadise8]

Ah, okay. Are you going slower because of the new medication? @Former-Member 

I'm not great, to be honest. I'm feeling very low 😥

Yes, I do hope it settles down. It's annoying. There are medications for tremors, but they interact with the medication I take that causes the tremor. 

No, it didn't, but oh well, oh yeah, I can see how you would see that. 

Oh, I'm sorry. I wish you could go out to do those things. 

Yes, I'm doing the intro. Another is doing the hypothesis, aim, and method, another is doing the result, and the other is doing the discussion. I'll let you know the points later on once I've done it. 

Yeah, all good; I understand things are difficult for you at the moment 🫂🌸

[Former-Member]

I’m sorry that’s happening today @creative_writer 🫂🌺💜

I hope it settles down for you very soon sweetheart 💜🌺

I think having the option to get to know someone first would be a great advantage in terms of having been through trauma Creative_writer, because it would give you that essential opportunity to see how much a person is willing to meet you where you are, and give you the respect, support, and space you need 🙂🌺

a connection with a partner should be where comfort exists, and safety exists ☺️

Then, if you feel that comfort and safety, other things can be so much easier to share and overcome, even without disclosing all about what you’ve been through. I have been in a relationship where I felt safe and comforted, and with all my autonomy, and I did mention to him I had experienced some difficulties, and his reply was to say he didn’t change the way he thought of me, and everything was all my decisions. I wanted to share this small example with you, because it can kindly show how the right match can make all the difference 🙂🌺

And just to gently let you know, I don’t think anything different or less of you for what you have been through; I actually think that you are a wonderful person, with so much insight and much to offer the world ☺️🌺💜

[Former-Member]

Yes @Birdofparadise8 ..the medication is a little bit to get used to 💜🌺🙂

I’m sorry you’re feeling low..😔💜

would you like to talk about it here, if you feel comfortable? 🌺

Holding space for you and here on and off today for the rest of the day if that’s helpful 🙂🌺

That sounds hard, having the medication that treats tremor interacting with the one you need that causes the side effect of tremor 💜

it’s hard when nothing can be done, but just gently remember you’re doing what you can to be the best you can be, and for one I’m very proud of you for keeping on and pushing through 🙂🌺💜

Thank you kindly regarding going out and doing things - I really appreciate it 🙂🌺 not to worry though, I do enjoy doing what I do and still trying to be the best I can ☺️🙌🏻

Ah, yep - makes sense regarding the group report. Please do feel free to discuss your points later on - I’ll be really interested to read them 😀🌺

thanks so much, that really means a lot 🥲 🤗🌺

[Birdofparadise8]

I'm sorry that would be hard. I'm sure you will get through it. 

Thank you, it's just my depression. I'm feeling sad, lonely, etc. 

I know it's so frustrating. It's not the end of the world anyway; I can cope with it. It's very minor. 

Thank you, @Former-Member. That means a lot you saying that. 

Can I ask what you do if you can't go out? 

Yeah, okay, I'll see how it goes. 

[Former-Member]

Thanks so much @Birdofparadise8 ☺️🤗🌺

I’ll  do my best and get a handle on it soon 🙌🏻🙂🌺

I understand, dearest..hearing you 💜💜 just want to gently say that even though it’s difficult to experience depression and live with how it feels, the fact that you are keeping going with coping strategies and skills is really lovely to see and I really admire how you do what you do to manage, while doing your best towards recovery 💜🌺🤗

yes, here at home I do lots of online projects for research, and the readings sometimes take a few days.. this is really motivating because the research but I have is usually to make things better for people in our systems, and medicine 🙂💜

otherwise I sew/make clothes, and watch some really interesting documentaries about architecture, nature, or science online or tv. 
my favourite home architect is John Lautner and I enjoy watching docos on his work. 
If there is anything on tv or online about exhibitions of art, I try to catch those, especially sculptures. 
I used to write stories, however I stopped doing that when it got difficult to remember things in detail 🙂

ok then - feel free to post about the assessment task any time 💜🌺

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 A very late hello, I have been having broken sleep lately and then it takes me some time to wake up properly. 

It's cleaning time at my house today, the brother is mopping and vacuuming while I continue rearranging the dining area. My house is not huge so it won't take long!

How are you travelling today? How's the mood?