😭

[Jynx]

Hiya @Blackcloud!! Was about to reply on ya other post, welcome back!! What's happening for ya this fine Monday?

[Blackcloud]

@Jynx i feel like im getting the holiday blues/post-vacation depression which does explain another post that I posted yesterday on here about losing out of touch with reality after i came back here in australia and stuff. I still dont have the motivation, but I have begun editing my very first vlog for my upcoming youtube stuff just 2 hours ago and i'm still in the process of editing it. With the captions/subtitles, I'd say I've managed to have done those through at least 15% of the whole video/vlog so far. I still have more to go lol I hope I can get through all of this and be able to finish this whole vlog thing before the end of this week hopefully.

So I was basically kinda able to get my crap together through editing the vlog even though i was and AM still going through it mentally but I was able to do it! Are you proud of me? 🥹

[Jynx]

@Blackcloud Aww hun, that's rough as!! I'm glad you're able to recognise it as that, makes it easier to reassure ourselves hey. Do you have ways of keeping your chin up, reminding yourself of the things that help you keep going? Sounds like editing has been a good thing to help you focus!! And yes I am so proud of ya!! 😊😊

[Blackcloud]

@Jynx I do but I haven't really been using those strategies for ages. I'd say one of the strategies that I use these days is just telling myself some things like "if you keep holding back/continuing to feel anxious about something that you really think about wanting to do, do it now, not later" and then "do it before its too late", and I was able to apply that for the editing vlog stuff when I couldn't stop thinking about when I really need to start editing them. I guess you can consider that self-discipline?

I do find that listening to music whilst doing these kinds of tasks helps too than when I dont listen to music whilst doing them. But right now I havent listened to any music whilst editing my vlog so I should be doing that now or whenever I can haha xD but I'm sure I can get through editing a bit even while not listening to music. We'll see about that 😛

Also, feel free to reply to my other post that you've mentioned before if you're comfortable to 🙂 if not, thats fine. no biggie!

[Jynx]

@Blackcloud replied!

Sometimes it can be suuuper helpful to get stuck back into our strategies and give em a bit of practice!! But of course, you know your needs best 😊

Yeah that's definitely self-discipline!! Question tho - does it feel motivational, or shaming for you? Just curious!!

Oh yeah for me, music is like, the BEST concentration fuel hehe. Does have to be the right kind though, something with no lyrics and a driving beat usually helps me stay focused!

[Blackcloud]

Sorry I didn’t reply to this one earlier @Jynx I would find it to be kinda motivational when I say those things to myself

[Jynx]

No dramas @Blackcloud take as long as you need to take for replies! 

I'm glad to hear that it does feel like a supportive/validating type of mindset moreso than one built around shame. Can be a fine line to walk sometimes hey!! 

Hope you're well?

[Blackcloud]

hi @Jynx i'm doing fine today thanks. Haven't been feeling mentally well these days and have lacked motivation to do anything. 

BUT with regards to editing this video for youtube, I've now finally finished editing the whole video!! Though it literally took me a week and a half to complete it all (because a lot of the times I was only able to do it a little bit day by day whilst feeling mentally unmotivated at the same time), and now I'm just going through the whole video and making some minor changes to it.

I still need to make the thumbnail and then...come up with a description on the video when I upload it to youtube. 

It's gonna be my very first video after waaaaay over 2 and a half years since I've last uploaded my previous video.

I hope that for this upcoming one that I'll be able to get an increasing amount of views and subscribers within a short period... *pray*

[Jynx]

@Blackcloud woohoo! Congrats! Yes all my fingers and toes are crossed for you getting a good response!! 🤞

How you feeling about it all now? I can imagine it's that funny mixture of 'phew, relief, I finished!' and 'OHMYGODIAMSONERVOUS' 😅

[Blackcloud]

@Jynx thank you, that means a lot!! <33

and yeah pretty much hahaha, I just need to deal with it i guess 😅 I don't wanna see any potential mean and criticism comments that at least one person will comment on cause that sort of thing always is what comes in mind