Not Coping

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 hey my princess, what's happening?

I thought you'd probably be in a bad way. I'll be around on and off for the rest of the day.

I've fixed the Foxtel errors I was getting, cleaned out the fridge, cleaned the living room and put a slow cooker lamb casserole on so I'm ready to sit back and chat 🤗

What's been happening? x

[Former-Member]

I can understand he was asking about things like planning and safety @Birdofparadise8 and I think going over time may have been his way to stay helpful, knowing you'll have an extra week in between 💜

That sounds like a good plan for cooking, spreading the tasks out a bit, so you can get done what you need to do for your study 🙂

I dont think it will arrive today, it's too late and so I am hoping they bring it tomorrow 🙂 

[Birdofparadise8]

What hasn't been happening @ENKELI 

Would you be able to have a look through it? 

[Birdofparadise8]

He has gone over a few times @Former-Member 

I don't even know how he keeps track, lol. He has a watch on, but I don't think there is a clock behind me, and I swear I never see him look at it. 

The moment I said, I felt people would be better off if I weren't here. I think alarm bells went off for him. I was so scared saying it, and a few other things like the pool, the light being off and what I said to my friend about feeling like I would be better off without friends at this point. 

I'm not going to complain about going over. 

Yeah, I will make the white sauce tomorrow. 

Oh gosh. Can you call them? 

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 Give me some time and I'll go through the thread, then get back to you

[Birdofparadise8]

Okay, thank you @ENKELI 

[Former-Member]

Sounds like the priority is on helping, instead of watching the clock @Birdofparadise8 😊 which is a very good thing. 

Im glad you felt motivated to mention how you felt to him despite being scared to do so - this gives him what he needs to do his best to help you 🙂

I hope it helped with how you feel, too, to talk about it xx

Sounds like a good idea, making the white sauce tomorrow 🙂

I called them earlier today, and they promised this afternoon, however I do understand it is an irregular delivery and may take time to organise in their enormous and very automated logistics systems. I will call them again tomorrow 🙂

[Birdofparadise8]

Yes, it is good @Former-Member 

Yes, I mentioned a whole page of things I felt so scared to say, but I said them. 

I was pleased he knows, but it's not like he can take any of it away. 

I'm abandoned for next week. 

I'm really not feeling great tonight. I want everything to go away. I need this pain and these emotions to go away. 

That's really slack when it's a piece of medical equipment you need to breathe. 

[Former-Member]

well done for overcoming that fear, and for mentioning them @Birdofparadise8 - that took courage, determination, and also the drive to want to address what's happening for you, which I want to say to you is part of your resilience that you may not be able to feel, but its there xx

Youre right in that he cant take any of it away, but with him knowing about it, he might just be able to help you manage 🙂

Im sorry to hear that tonight youre not feeling so great, knowing that you have a long wait till the next appointment, and the pain and emotions are not letting go.. gently, dearest.. be gentle with yourself, ok? 🙂 

Yes, they aren't doing a great job lately, but that is not a problem, I can follow this issue along, and provide feedback to request systems changes, which is my personal speciality 🙌😊

[Birdofparadise8]

Thank you @Former-Member 

I'm not managing, though. 

Yes, precisely two weeks is so long. 

I just want to jump forward and all this is over with. 

Okay, well, I hope that works for you. 

What are you doing tonight?